My brain is trying to wrap itself around the fact that 2013 is truly here. 2013 is present day life right now, not something still in the future.
At the beginning of December I started thinking about what I wanted my new word of the year to be. I pondered it for awhile and thought I had chosen it. There were a couple in the running. But then about a week ago a different word worked its way into my mind and it has not budged.
It is a powerful word. A strong word. A word that has a lot of potential if I fully embrace it in the manner I envision it.
My word for 2013?
This definition captures the essence of what it means to me rather well.
In particular, the words “process” and “potentiality” jump out at me.
This year I want to focus more on the process and progress I am making in my life, and not so much on a-once-attained-and-then-you’re-done kind of goal. For me “becoming” focuses on the journey – the potholes, the speed bumps, the coastings, the uphills, the downhills, the joy rides – and not the final destination.
Becoming is a present tense word, not past tense or future tense. It is optimistic. It is hopeful. It is forgiving and tolerant. It is merciful. It is flexible. It is open minded, resourceful, respectful and accepting.
By choosing the word becoming, I feel like it means I am embracing all of me more fully – my faults, flaws, mistakes, blunders, successes, idiosyncrasies, advancements and everything in between. Choosing the word becoming means accepting myself while on this journey of life, and not just the end-of-journey me. It means embracing the me who dusts herself off and journeys on with courage and determination, even if it is a bit timidly at times, as opposed to wallowing in the dust while on the ground and staying put because I got dirty or marred.
It means filling my bucket with Drops of Awesome. It means remembering “you made the right choice once. And in that moment you were the person you want to be and that is a triumph. … Drop of Awesome!”
I want to focus more on these moments so I can become the person I want to become, the person I know I can be, as opposed to allowing the negative self talk battling it out in my brain to bring me down into despair and discouragement. “[God] wants us to feel joy. Not later, when we no longer make mistakes, but right now.”
This year I want to work on more truly accepting myself as who I am and where I am in my life journey. I need to remember that this life is a process and I won’t be complete until its done … and more importantly I won’t be complete until after the Atonement of Christ has made it so. I need to recognize that I am a work-in-progress and then become joyful of this state of being I am in, of where I am right now in present day life.
- Becoming more joyful.
- Becoming a more compassionate listener.
- Becoming calmer and less of a reactive and yelly mom.
- Becoming more purposeful in my relationships with my children.
- Becoming less of a night owl.
- Becoming more comfortable in my own skin - physically, emotionally, and intellectually. In other words embracing me for who I am and then becoming OK with the fact that that me might be different than most people.
- Becoming more healthy and fit, and not as reliant on and addicted to sugar.
- Becoming more willing to share and give of myself.
- Becoming more aware of those around me.
- Becoming more gentle.
- Becoming more gracious.
- Becoming more charitable – more patient, more long suffering and less easily offended.
- Becoming one with my Savior.
These might sound like a lot of lofty goals, but they aren’t as long as I remain steadily pointed in the right direction and then accept the stumbles I know I will have along the way. For me it is learning how to live in the moment, learning how to relish the small victories and not letting the bumps keep me down.
In reality it is the process of moving in the right direction, one baby step at a time. One Drop of Awesome at a time until I need a new bucket to hold all the drops I have collected.
Indeed it is becoming.
I hope everyone is having a healthy, happy and purposeful start to their new year.